Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Knock -- knock...

...who's at my door this early in the morning?

Neither the Cardinals or the Robins have started their wake-up songs at this time of morning. 

Why. . .  Good morning! You've smelled the coffee I was brewing -- didn't you.

You know I'm an early bird.

I don't sleep well so, why stay in bed -- I might as well get up and do something useful.

It was a strange and irritating day yesterday.

I've got an even stranger question: "Why do these food manufacturers package their goods in these easy to open packages that aren't easy to open? Isn't that misleading?"

Really, look


These are suppose to be easy to open packages and I still have to use a knife of scissors to open them -- something's wrong with that picture.

Look at the re-closable cheese packages -- they rip when you tear open where it says: "tear open"  -- you can't use them and have to put them in a baggie.

If you think about it -- they jack up the price of the item for packaging so, they're telling a lie when they say it's easy to open -- right. Didn't they use to call that false advertising?  Can I sue?

Okay, so, I'm on a roll today -- sorry!


I went to the Chiropractor and he used this benign looking table to bend and twist me in ways I haven't bend or twist in years. You know I'm like an old stale pretzel -- crumbling if you look at me wrong.

Any way, after I got home and was sitting in my usual spot [here in front of the computer] my son came and asked me the strangest question.

He said "Mom, I didn't know Mandy had two kids" I'm thinking yes she does, but why is he asking about her.

Just as I got up to ask him what I was thinking, low and behold the front door opens and in comes hurricane Mandy carrying her darling Queen Elizabeth and right behind her toddled her son AJ.

I was in shock -- She's never come visit me.

Who is she -- Oh, sorry, she's my best friend's [beside you, of course] youngest daughter.

She says: "Miss Debbie I'm stressed. My boyfriend is getting on my nerves. I've got to be out of my apartment by the end of the month, and W.I.C gave me the wrong milk coupon for Elizabeth" 

Look, this girl doesn't breath between sentences, her mouth is M-16 caliber and fully loaded. She's the only person that I know on the planet that can shut my son up. Neither he nor anybody else gets a word in edge wise -- believe me!

I said: "Breath Mandy breath -- you can't think straight when you're stressed" 

Mandy: "But I'm stressed, I'm so stressed -- I don't know what to do"   

Well she went on and on for about half an hour. She told me about how she has to get out of her condo by the 30th of this month. The new owner won't take Section 8.

I knew she was on section 8 for low income or no income people for housing, but man alive the government allows her to rent a house or an apartment for up to [are you ready] $1050 a month.

Can you believe that! 

I'm all for helping people get on their feet but GHEESH  why do they get to live better than I do?

Come on now, this is like rewarding people for uncontrolled procreation.

Just spit babies out and you get a nice house and food to feed them [along with the no good, slovenly male, living with you.]

I worked all my life, at a great paying job, and never could I afford that.

Don't get me started on this soap box. However, I will tell you, I do resent the fact that I worked hard all my life and couldn't afford to pay that kind a rent. A rent which would have put me in a nice neighborhood.

I raised my child off the sweat of my brow.

But, NO! -- all I had to do was lay down and spread my.....

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